Hope to see YOU there!

At the salvation Army church, Barrie, Saturday, Oct 22 at 11 am… followed by the guest speaker (me)
The tickets are 12.00 and I have some if you wish to attend.
Also on the 23, I am the guest preacher for the church service (no charge but the collection plate!)
Message titles-Saturday-The Butternut Squash Conspiracy
Sunday- Happy Daze, Life after 40, or 50 or more!

Life Conundrums

Why is it that stay-on lipstick lasts longer on cup rims than on lips?

Why is it that birds start to chirp at least one hour before the alarm clock goes off?

Why is it that babies need another diaper change right after you change them?

Why is it that a permanent wave treatment is not permanent?

Why is it that my phrasing here is such bad English?

Why is it that a God who could do anything he wants, bothers with us?

I don’t know the answers to any of these questions. Do you?

And he said unto them, Out of the eater came forth meat, and out of the strong came forth sweetness. And they could not in three days expound the riddle. (Judges 14:14, KJV)

Prayer – Thanks God, for making life confusing and so interesting at the same time!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lost Licence

The doctor asked me not to drive until after some tests were completed. The tests were expected to take anywhere from two weeks to two months. It wasn’t the doctor’s fault, really. It is a government guideline, but that didn’t help my head much. I gave myself the Peter disease.

UGH!! Not drive? What was she thinking? How would I get to where I needed to go? How would I get to the grocery store or a doctor appointment? I’d have to beg the kids for a ride. I’d have to sell my home and go live in my kids’ basement. What about my car? What would I do with it?

In minutes, I’d worked myself into hysteria. Then I called friends and family and shared the disease. Some of them refused to take it on. They offered calm; they offered rides; they offered compassion… BUT I DIDN’T WANT ANY OF IT! I WANTED TO DRIVE MY OWN SELF IN MY OWN CAR!!!

But I had no choice, or so I thought.

I forgot to remember Peter, who forgot to remember Jesus

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy-laden and overburdened, and I will cause you to rest. (Matthew 11:28a, AMP)

Prayer – Father, forgive us for forgetting, rePETERly, again and again, what you tell us. Amen

 

 

 

 

 

Try these on for size!

  • Spotted in an office:  After the coffee break, all staff must empty the coffee pots and stand upside down on the drain board.
  • In a health food store window: Closed due to sickness.
  • On a sign: If you can’t read, you can get help at this address.
  • Overheard:  Return my stolen stepladder or further steps will be taken.
  • News headline: Police now running down jaywalkers.

We faithful tend to be a little gloomy… But the truth is, life is funnier than we allow. Smile and the world smiles with you…

All you saints! Sing your hearts out to God! Thank him to his face! He gets angry once in a while, but across a lifetime there is only love. The nights of crying your eyes out give way to days of laughter.(Psalm 30:4-5, MSG)

Prayer – Father God, help us see the joy in living the life you gave us! Amen

 

 

 

 

 

Whale Tales

James Bartley (1870–1909) is said to have been swallowed whole by a sperm whale. His ship mates found him a few days later in the stomach of that sperm whale (which, it is said, died of constipation!).

Some say this is impossible but it has happened before…

Now the Lord had prepared and appointed a great fish to swallow up Jonah. And Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights. (Jonah 1:17, AMP)

Was ‘the great fish’ in the Book of Jonah a whale?

Does it matter?

No.

It does matter that we believe God’s Word for what it is, the truth.

Some people don’t care to believe that Jonah existed, but he is mentioned in 2 kings 14:25 and Jesus spoke of him in Matthew 12:39-41. In short, Jesus said that no sign shall be given but that of Jonah, three days and nights in the belly of a sea monster… and he added that someone (himself) greater than Jonah is here.

Prayer – Lord, we have decided to take you at your word. Just as Jonah was a sign to the Ninevites, so Jesus is the sign to all nations now. Praise his name! Amen